"No, Jacob. I know you want your Reese’s, but they’ll spoil your appetite. And I know you want your Reese’s more than dinner. Honestly, they taste better than what Mommy’s making – but that’s because they’re evil. What you need are raw vegetables, dark green lettuce and fresh radishes. Now, I know they taste like dirt. They came from dirt. But they’ll give you more energy and build muscle mass so you can run two miles and do half an hour per day on the elliptical like me. Don’t you want to be big and strong and perpetually sore from exercise, just like Daddy? Many nights you’ll be left too tired to do more than watch Idol, but imagine how good you’ll look, and it will add years to your life. Seven, ten, maybe thirteen years. Thirteen more years of eating meals you hate, exercising until you ache all the time, and mild condescension towards those who sag more than you do. That’s much better for you than eating Easter candy before dinner. Now give Daddy those Reese’s."