Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Bathroom Monologue: Think he can still get a reference?
"Oh, you're firing me for a new black guy who you can pay less. Yeah, I understand completely, I've always wanted to lose my paycheck and health benefits so you can start a new guy at bottom salary and claim a tax credit. It's a lifelong dream. I'm just wondering, you know, since there are already so many African Americans on staff, if you're going to be hiring Latinos. I mean, it is affirmative action, right? If your staff is half black and half white, you're ignoring Hispanics. And Asians, and Native Americans. Not to mention immigrants. I mean legal ones, of course, 'cause you'd never hire illegal immigrants no matter how little they'd work for, or how many rights they'd give up for the privilege of serving you, right? Right. They can't type well. Yet. But how many immigrants, and how many colors of immigrants are you going to hire? 'Cause come to think of it, we only speak English in here. Your little monochrome rainbow isn't exactly cutting it. Where are the French? The Russians? The Taiwanese? Or do you not consider them a country? You do want to act affirmatively, don't you? And what about the Jews? They think they're a race. Do you hire a quota of them? No, that's poor taste. They have a bad history with quotas. But since I'm losing my job, I guess I don't like quotas either."